Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Friday, January 22, 2010
Although I love being there for my friends and family, I do believe it is healthy to have some personal time. Don’t get me wrong, I love just lounging around the couch, watching Grey’s or whatever might be on, but the minute the phone rings, I am all over it, throwing on my shoes, and I’m out the door.
I think this comes from a number of places.
1. I like to please everyone and don’t want to tell them no, as in some other universe, it may be interpreted as letting them down. I want them to feel like if they call me, they know they can count on me to show up.
2. I have this fear that I might miss out on something important, or not even important but memorable, and when I am out next, everyone will refer to the night that I missed out on. Stupid yes, usually fears are based on something stupid.
3. I am social butterfly and love time with friends. It is hard to turn down an event, b/c I love my socially active life.
So here is my new plan. I am going to continue to go out and have a good time, but not at the detriment of my sanity. If I need to do laundry/dishes/pay bills/ or just lay back and kick it, I will agree to stay home and do just that.
Some people may get where I am coming from, and others may think I put too much thought into it, but I would like to leave you with a quote from Buddha…
“You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.”
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
I am dusting off my work out clothes, pulling out the old gym card, and starting cooking again. I must say I am most excited about the cooking. I finally got my grill up and running and can’t wait to start grilling everything in sight.
As a part of my new diet regimen, I am cutting back on drinking, (Shriek!!) I Know!!
No worries Apple, I will exclude such occasions as your birthday shindig. I know that the calories don’t help my cause, and the hangovers will just jack with my workout schedule.
I hope everyone enjoyed their New Year and I look forward to a fresh start.
Monday, November 9, 2009
Today, friendships are not so easy. It takes more effort, more give and take. With my new confidence in tact (Ahem, Apple), I have discovered that some friendships, however entertaining, are not always the best thing for you. Sometimes it is good to step back and take a break, because we all need breaks sometimes.
As I get older, I have become pickier about who I let in my circle, and who deserves my time. I am very happy with the people in my life that I consider friends. I know I can count on them no matter what, whether it be crying like a baby after a breakup, or venting about everything under the sun.
I realize now, after all these years, that friendships do not come free, they must be earned and appreciated. I can not, and refuse to settle for less. I will leave you all with a quote that spoke volumes to me.
“The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.”
- Maureen Dowd
Friday, November 6, 2009
This act of hatred awakens feelings that I have suppressed since the 9/11 attacks. I was deeply moved then, and maybe even more so now. My brother just left for boot camp not 3 weeks ago, luckily stationed in a fort outside of Texas. I couldn’t help but wonder what the families are going through, thinking what if it were my brother’s fort. Not to sound overly dramatic, just overcome with emotion. It hit home for me.
My heart goes out to all family members and friends that were affected by this tragedy. It is things like this that remind me how important it is to live each day to the fullest, because you never know if it will be your last. I want all my family and friends to know that I love each and every one of you. Please keep all our soldiers in your prayers.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
What I lack in confidence, I make up for with my friends. I think people tend to surround themselves around others that they admire or aspire to be. One trait that I do not possess is an overly confident attitude. A “kiss my ass if you don’t like it”, if you will. I long for the day that I truly disregard others opinions of me. And as if the outside world’s views aren’t bad enough, I have an inner monologue of self doubt, playing like a broken record. Whoever said, “no one can make you feel inferior but yourself” is a genius. I control how I let people’s opinions affect me. Which means I have the power to change it.
I am blessed to be surrounded by friends that exude self confidence. Every one of my friends have strong characteristics that I admire. They help me see that I am stronger and more confident than I let on. For all my friends out there, I want to say thank you, for inspiring me daily to be the best that I can be, today. I want to leave you all with a quote that I love.
“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”
-- Dr. Seuss
Thursday, October 29, 2009
So my short stint at dating has already come to a crashing halt. After escaping a 5 year relationship that really should have ended 3 years in, I was eager to get out in the dating world. Trying to heal my bruised ego, from months of self doubt in a relationship going nowhere, I was looking for someone that would boost my self esteem and renew my faith in men.
I guess that is a lot of expectations for my unsuspecting new date J
We met at a kickball tournament end of season bash (AKA Zypher’s) through connections of April, and I should of known from the start it was doomed. He went on about how he too had just gotten out of a 5 year relationship as well and was afraid of the idea of marriage. April forewarned me, but did I listen? No!! I was not looking for anything serious anyway, so I disregarded the warning signs, and voila, my dating disaster began.
My date, (let’s call him noncommittal man), and I had fun at first. We went out for dinners, watched movies together, even spent the day at the fair. But the more I got to know him, the more I realized why he was single. He was non committal towards everything. He was so worried about the idea of a “relationship” of any kind, that he didn’t want to meet my friends! That’s right folks, he was afraid to meet my friends b/c then people might think we were (gasp) dating!! He wasn’t looking for anything serious either.
I told him that if he ever wanted to date anyone, it would involve going out and being social. No such luck. So now I am done. I’m sorry, but trying to convince someone to hang out with my friends, is not my idea of someone I want to date.
I am not throwing in the towel yet, dating is still on the agenda, but maybe next time I will be more picky about who I will allow into my world.